Christmas 2013:  Jazz Hands

Christmas 2013: Jazz Hands

Scheiss Weekly, Christmas 2013, jazz hands Mamacita says: Another Christmas has come and is almost gone, except for those people who use December 25 simply as an excuse to actually do the things they only think about doing the other 364 days; Christmas for these people is every day. It’s just that we act on the feelings Christmas instills in us in a larger way, instead of the more subtle way we do these same things the other days of the year.  Which is a very awkward sentence,  mixing tenses and persons and leaving parallel structure out in the cold.

It’s Christmas, so let’s leave a lot of things out in the cold.

Bad feelings, for example.  Kick ’em out into the cold and slam the door on them.  Hard.  That list of what we used to call the “Seven Deadly Sins.”  Out into the cold.  All of them.  Wrath. Greed. Sloth. Pride. Lust. Envy. Gluttony. We need exactly none of these things, and none of them has ever done so much as a particle of good for anyone.

I think all seven sins could be summed up with one expression:  lack of self control.  Without self control, people do terrible things to themselves and to others.

If everyone exercised some self control, we wouldn’t have to worry about any of those stupid things.  Even when we call it “self expression” and “freedom” and “rights,”  it’s still a simple matter of rationalizing away a lack of self control.

At Christmas, people with no self control can become monsters.  At all other times, too.

At Christmas, people with self control can become heroes.  At all other times, too.

This is the time of year when good people actually behave like the people we hope we are all the rest of the year.  At Christmas, we discover who we really are, and sometimes we get a peek at who others really are, too.  Most of the time, those peeks show us an almost perfect world.  Sometimes those peeks show us what the monsters under the bed look like.  And who they are.

This Christmas, my sisters and our daughters and I all got wonderful warm gloves from our brother in Idaho, so we sent him a picture of our smiling faces and awesome jazz hands.

I said “awesome” and I meant “awesome.”

My sisters and I are awesome.  So are our daughters.  And our sons.  And our mother, and uncles, and aunts, and cousins, and neighbors.  Our cats are awesome.

And so are you and yours.

Merry Christmas, beloveds.  I can’t quit you, and I don’t want to.

Toto, little dog too, Scheiss WeeklyAnd your little dog, too.

 

Christmas 2013:  Jazz Hands

It’s the Journey, not the Destination

Christmas, quotation, quote, Scheiss Weekly, Jane GoodwinMamacita says:  I love these days leading up to Christmas more than any other time of the year. I love the planning. I love the baking. I love the making lists and checking them twice. I love the shopping, which I actually do all year long. I love Amazon Prime, which gives me free 2-day shipping.  I love wrapping the boxes and decorating them with ribbons and glittery things.  I love the Christmas music blasting (at 11, of course) from Spotify and iTunes and plain old cd’s.  I love getting out and using the Christmas plates and bowls and glasses. I love making my house look like a Christmas card. I love welcoming people into my home and sharing everything I have with them. I love watching Christmas movies, which I’m doing tomorrow afternoon, in fact;  welcome to my Dickens’ A Christmas Carol marathon.  I know the book by heart, thanks to my father (Daddy, what’s a doornail and how can it be dead?) and I’m quite critical of any movie version that takes too many liberties.

And I love quotations about Christmas.

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(#25 is my favorite.  I think of it regularly.  It reminds me of my father, before the diabetes made him. . . different.)

1.  There’s nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.  — Erma Bombeck

2.  This is the message of Christmas:  We are never alone.  — Taylor Caldwell

3.  Remember, if Christmas isn’t found in your heart, you won’t find it under a tree.  — Charlotte Carpenter

4.  Unless we make Christmas an occasion to share our blessings, all the snow in Alaska won’t make it “white.”  — Bing Crosby

5.  We consider Christmas as the encounter, the great encounter, the historical encounter, the decisive encounter, between God and mankind.  He who has faith knows this truly; let him rejoice.  –  Pope Paul VI

6.  My first copies of Treasure Island and Huckleberry Finn still have some blue spruce needles scattered in the pages.  They smell of Christmas still.  — Charlton Heston

7.  My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple:  loving others.  Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?  — Bob Hope

8.  The joy of brightening other lives, bearing each others’ burdens, easing others’ loads and supplanting empty hearts and lives with generous gifts becomes for us the magic of Christmas.  — W.C. Jones

9.  Christmas gift suggestions:  To your enemy, forgiveness.  To an opponent, tolerance.  To a friend, your heart.  To a customer, service.  To all, charity.  To every child, a good example.  To yourself, respect.  — Oren Arnold

10. The perfect Christmas tree?  All Christmas trees are perfect!  — charles N. Barnard

11.  Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love.  — Hamilton Wright Mabie

12.  Christmas is a necessity.  There has to be at least one day of the year to remind us that we’re here for something besides ourselves.  — Eric Sevareid

13.  The sharpest memory of our old-fashioned Christmas Eve is my mother’s hand making sure I was settled in bed.  — Paul Engle

14.  Our hearts grow tender with childhood memories and love of kindred, and we are better throughout the year for having, in spirit, become a child again at Christmas-time.  — Laura Ingalls Wilder

15.  There has been only one Christmas – the rest are anniversaries.  — W.J. Cameron

16.  Instead of being a time of unusual behavior, Christmas is perhaps the only time in the year when people can obey their natural impulses and express their true sentiments without feeling self-conscious and, perhaps, foolish.  Christmas, in short, is about the only chance a man has to be himself.  — Francis C. Farley

17. My idea of a Christmas present is something entirely unnecessary and useless.  I have always noticed when I give this sort of thing that people love it.  — Kate Douglass Wiggin

18.  In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it “Christmas” and went to church; the Jews called it “Hanukkah” and went to synagogue; the atheists went to parties and drank.  People passing each other on the street would say “Merry Christmas!” or “Happy Hanukkah!” or, (to the atheists) “Look out for the wall!”  — Dave Barry

19. Christmas is the season for kindling the fire of hospitality in the hall, the genial flame of charity in the heart. —  Washington Irving

20.  The message of Christmas is that the visible material world is bound to the invisible spiritual world.  — Author Unknown

21.  The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C.  This wasn’t for any religious reasons.  They couldn’t find three wise men and a virgin.  — Jay Leno

22.  The earth has grown old with its burden of care, but at Christmas it always is young.  — Phillips Brooks

23.  Nothing’s as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas.  — Kin Hubbard

24.  Christmas – that magic blanket that wraps itself about us, that something so intangible that it is like a fragrance.  It may weave a spell of nostalgia.  Christmas may be a day of feasting, or of prayer, but always it will be a day of remembrance – a day in which we think of everything we have ever loved.  — Augusta E. Rundel

25.  There are many things from which I might have derived good, by which I have not profited, I dare say, Christmas among the rest.  But I am sure I have always thought of Christmas time, when it has come round – apart from the veneration due to its sacred name and origin, if anything belonging to it can be apart from that – as a good time: a kind, forgiving, charitable, pleasant time: the only time I know of, in the long calendar of the year, when men and women seem by one consent to open their shut-up hearts freely, and to think of people below them as if they really were fellow-passengers to the grave, and not another race of creatures bound on other journeys.  And therefore, uncle, though it has never put a scrap of gold or silver in my pocket, I believe that it has done me good, and will do me good, and I say, God bless it!  — Charles Dickens

26.  Probably the reason we all go so haywire at Christmas time with the endless unrestrained and often silly buying of gifts is that we don’t quite know how to put our love into words.  — Harlan Miller

27.  The only real blind person at Christmas-time is he who has no Christmas in his heart.  — Helen Keller

28.  Off to one side sits a group of shepherds.  They sit silently on the floor, perhaps perplexed, perhaps in awe, no doubt in amazement.  Their night watch had been interrupted by an explosion of light from heaven and a symphony of angels.  God goes to those who have time to hear him – and so on this cloudless night he went to simple shepherds.  — Max Lucado

29.  Of course this is the season to be jolly, but it is also a good time to be thinking about those who aren’t.  — Helen Valentine

30.  When we recall Christmas past, we usually find that the simplest things – not the great occasions – give off the greatest glow of happiness.  — Bob Hope

31.  What is Christmas?  It is tenderness for the past, courage for the present, hope for the future.  It is a fervent wish that every cup may overflow with blessings rich and eternal, and that every path may lead to peace.  — Agnes M. Pharo

32.  We should try to hold on to the Christmas spirit not just one day a year, but 365.  — Mary Martin

33.  May we not “spend” Christmas or “observe” Christmas, but rather “keep” it.  — Peter Marshall

34.  Why should we rejoice on Christmas Day?  This is where the problem lies, not in secular bacchanalias, not in Santa Clauses with cotton beards, loudspeakers blatting out Christmas carols the day after Thanksgiving not in shops full of people pushing and shouting and swearing at each other as they struggle to buy overpriced Christmas present.  No, it’s not the secular world which presents me with problems about Christmas.  It’s God.  — Madeleine L’Engle

35.  A lovely thing about Christmas is that it’s compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.  — Garrison Keillor

36.  Late on a sleepy, star-spangled night, those angels peeled back the sky just like you would tear open a sparkling Christmas present.  Then, with light and joy pouring out of Heaven like water through a broken dam, they began to shout and sing the message that baby Jesus had been born.  The world had a Savior!  The angels called it “Good News,” and it was.  — Larry Libby

37.  I sometimes think we expect too much of Christmas Day.  We try to crowd into it the long arrears of kindliness and humanity of the whole year.  As for me, I like to take my Christmas a little at a time, all through the year.  And thus I drift along into the holidays – let them overtake me unexpectedly – waking up some fine morning and suddenly saying to myself, “Why, this is Christmas Day!”  — David Grayson

38. God’s visit to earth took place in an animal shelter with no attendants present and nowhere to lay the newborn king but a feed trough. . . For just an instant the sky grew luminous with angels, yet who saw the spectacle? Illiterate hirelings who watched the flocks of others, “nobodies” who failed to leave their names. . . . –Philip Yancy

39. Christmas isn’t just a day. It’s a frame of mind. –Valentine Davies

40. Christmas, my child, is love in action. Every time we love, every time we give, it’s Christmas. –Dale Evans

41. Remember, if Christmas isn’t found in your heart, you won’t find it under a tree. –Charlotte Carpenter

42. To the American People: Christmas is not a time or a season but a state of mind. To cherish peace and good will, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas. If we think on these things, there will be born in us a Savior and over us will shine a star sending its gleam of hope to the world. –Calvin Coolidge

43. The Church does not superstitiously observe days, merely as days, but as memorials of important facts. Christmas might be kept as well upon one day of the year as another; but there should be a stated day for commemorating the birth of our Savior, because there is danger that what may be done on any day, will be neglected. — Samuel Johnson

44. They err who thinks Santa Claus comes down through the chimney; he really enters through the heart. –Mrs. Paul M. Ell

45. The perfect Christmas tree? All Christmas trees are perfect! –Charles N. Barnard

46. Christmas Eve was a night of song that wrapped itself about you like a shawl. But it warmed more than your body. It warmed your heart. . . filled it, too, with melody that would last forever. –Bess Streeter Aldrich

47. Christmas gift suggestions: To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance. To a friend, your heart. To a customer, service. To all, charity. To every child, a good example.  To yourself, respect.  – Oren Arnold

48. Which Christmas is the most vivid to me? It’s always the next Christmas. –Joanne Woodward

49. Christmas is a necessity. There has to be at least one day of the year to remind us that we’re here for something else besides ourselves. –Eric Sevareid

50. One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don’t clean it up too quickly. –Andy Rooney

51. Christmas is the keeping place for memories of our innocence. –Joan Mills

52. So here comes Gabriel again, and what he says is “Good tidings of great joy. . . for all people.” That’s why the shepherds are first: they represent all the nameless, all the working stiffs, the great wheeling population of the whole world. –Walter Wangerin Jr.

53. Christmas is the day that holds all time together. –Alexander Smith

54. A Christmas candle is a lovely thing. It makes no noise at all. But softly gives itself away, While quite unselfish, it grows small. –Eva K. Logue

55. Christmas is not an eternal event at all, but a piece of one’s home that one carries in one’s heart. –Freya Stark

56. The magi, as you know, were wise men – wonderfully wise men, who brought gifts to the Babe in the manger. They invented the art of giving Christmas presents. –O. Henry

57. Perhaps the best Yuletide decoration is being wreathed in smiles. –Unknown

58. Christmas is the time to let your heart do the thinking. –Patricia Clafford

59. Christmas is for children. But it is for grownups, too. Even if it is a headache, a chore, and nightmare, it is a period of necessary defrosting of chill and hide-bound hearts. –Lenora Mattingly Weber

60. Christmas Day is a day of joy and charity. May God make you very rich in both. –Phillips Brooks

61. I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. –Shirley Temple

62. The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other. –Burton Hillis

63. So if a Christian is touched only once a year, the touching is still worth it, and maybe on some given Christmas, some quiet morning, the touch will take. –Harry Reasoner

64. A scientist said, making a plea for exchange scholarships between nations, “The very best way to send an idea is to wrap it up in a person.” That was what happened at Christmas. The idea of divine love was wrapped up in a Person. –Halford E. Luccock

65. As we struggle with shopping lists and invitations, compounded by December’s bad weather, it is good to be reminded that there are people in our lives who are worth this aggravation, and people to whom we are worth the same. –Donald E. Westlake

66. Ask your children two questions this Christmas. First: “What do you want to give to others for Christmas?” Second: What do you want for Christmas?” The first fosters generosity of heart and an outward focus. The second can breed selfishness if not tempered by the first. –Anonymous

67. Christmas has lost its meaning for us because we have lost the spirit of expectancy. We cannot prepare for an observance. We must prepare for an experience. –Handel H. Brown

67. Selfishness makes Christmas a burden. Love makes it a delight. –Unknown

68.  Christmas renews our youth by stirring our wonder.  The capacity for wonder has been called our most pregnant human faculty, for in it are born our art, our science, our religion. . .  — Ralph W. Sockman

69.  Were I a philosopher, I should write a philosophy of toys, showing that nothing else in life need to be taken seriously, and that Christmas Day in the company of children is one of the few occasions on which men become entirely alive. — Robert Lynd

70.  Our hearts grow tender with childhood memories  and love of kindred, and we are better throughout the year for having, in spirit, become a child again at Christmastime.  – Laura Ingalls Wilder

71.  Are you willing to believe that love is the strongest thing in the world – stronger than hate, stronger than evil, stronger than death – and that the blessed life which began in Bethlehem nineteen hundred years ago is the image and brightness of the Eternal Love? Then you can keep Christmas. – -Henry Van Dyke

72.  Art is for me the great integrater, and I understand Christianity as I understand art.  I understand Christmas as I understand Bach’sSleepers Awake or Jesu, Joy of Man’s Desiring; as I understand Braque’s clowns, Blake’s poetry.  And I understand it when I am able to pray with the mind in the heart… I am joyfully able to affirm the irrationality of Christmas. – Madeleine L’Engle

73.  Look, Doris, someday you’re going to find that your way of facing this realistic world just doesn’t work.  And when you do, don’t overlook those lovely intangibles.  You’ll discover those are the only things that are worthwhile.  — Fred, Miracle on 34th Street

74.  This is the irrational season                                                                                     When love blooms bright and wild.                                                                         Had Mary been filled with reason                                                                          There’d have been no room for the child.                                                                           –Madeleine L’Engle

75.  For unto you is born this ay in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.  And this shall be a sign unto you:  Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.  And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.  — The bible, Luke 2: 11-14

Christmas 2013:  Jazz Hands

Let’s Talk About Christmas

Christmas crown, Scheiss WeeklyMamacita says:  Let’s talk about Christmas. I consider it the crown: the end of the year, the thing that makes winter endurable.  Remember, Narnia was nothing but ice, snow, and bone-chilling cold while the White Witch ruled it.  “Always winter and never Christmas” is still one of the scariest descriptions I’ve ever heard.

The White Witch still wants to erase Christmas from our winter.  I’ve got an idea:  Let’s not allow it.

Honestly, I don’t care if people choose not to view December as the highlight of winter.  Celebrate something, or not. Your call.  Nobody is forcing you to believe in anything, but you probably will have to see things you refuse to have in your own home.  That’s your business, your own home.   I’m a firm believer in families doing whatever they want in their own homes.  Once outside that home, however,  people need to go with the flow, by which I mean simply BE NICE.  No one person is the center of the universe, including you.  .  It is only in our own homes that we deserve to get our own way.  And not all the time, unless you’re the only one living there.

If your belief system is that shaky, you might want to reconsider it.

Grinch, Scheiss Weekly, ChristmasGrinches will get no attention from me, except the smirk and snark when they turn their backs.  I expect the same consideration (until I turn my back) from them.  And if they’re nice and do what’s right, nobody will ever know they’re Grinch-y.  I’m sorry for their children, though.

In public, however, only rude beasts throw greetings back into someone’s face, or take offense if someone puts a symbol on their lawn.  Or throws a hissy fit at the sight of a symbol anywhere, for that matter.  Chill.  We live in a country wherein most of the population likes to do “something” at this time of year.  Take advantage and participate if you wish; don’t do anything about it if you wish.  Just be nice.  Everybody: just be nice.  When someone greets you, say “thank you.”  It’s easy.

Good manners are free.  Let’s all take advantage of that!

Remember:  easily offended people make good targets.  Old as I am, I want to poke them with a stick.  Don’t be that guy.  Smile.  Nobody’s trying to provoke you when they say dreadful abusive things like “Happy Hanukkah” or “Merry Christmas.”  They’re just happy and are including you in their joy.  Don’t be offended by “Happy Holidays,” either.  This philosophy works both ways.  Chill.  Everybody.  Chill.

I am Mamacita. Accept no substitutes!

Hitting the fan like no one else can...

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Scheiss Weekly by Jane Goodwin (Mamacita) is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 United States License.