I Am Mamacita

Mamacita says:  I have been Mamacita for many years online.  One’s online presence is of utmost importance, and the names we have chosen as representations of ourselves are equally important, as people associate the name with the person or business.

When newbies decide to go online, with a business or a blog or simply as a social media presence on Facebook or Twitter or Instagram, etc, it is very important that they choose their online names carefully.  If the name they choose to go by is their own name, that is fine; that is not what I am talking about here.  There are coincidences of actual names all the time.

It is when someone chooses a pseudonym for their online presence –  that requires careful consideration.

Those of us who have maintained an online presence for a long time are known by certain names, so if someone is new and wishes to use a certain name, it is vital that the newbie do some research to make sure they are not intruding into someone else’s established online presence.

I have recently discovered that several newbies have decided to make themselves known as “Mamacita,” which has been ME for twelve years.  I am getting their messages and am being associated with them, which I do not appreciate.  Since this is happening to me, I can only assume it is also happening to them, and I do not want clients and friends to mistake me for them or them for me in any way, shape, or form.

I Am Mamacita.   I.  Me.  Jane Goodwin.  I am Mamacita.  And you are not.

I Am Mamacita. I. Me. Jane Goodwin. I am Mamacita. And you are not.

We who have established specific and long-term internet names and presences are happy to welcome newbies to the blogosphere, but quite frankly, we do resent it when a new blogger or new entrepreneur decides to use a name that is already established online as belonging to a certain person or business.  This is unethical.  It is the equivalent of a person deciding to be “Macy’s” or “Kroger’s” because they like the sound of it or, and this is decidedly unethical, because they hope to get a piece of the action from an established name.  For that, they could be and probably would be sued, but when someone chooses to be known as a name already established by an online person who has been writing and doing business as that name for many years, what can we do?

Please, newbies.  Do some research before you go public with a chosen name.  Deciding that you want to use a certain name because you like it is not a good enough reason.  Find out if the name is free to be used.  Find out, before you decide YOU are going to be that person, if the name already belongs to a person.

Just deciding to blog under a name you like isn’t enough now.  Online names belong to people.  Choose one that isn’t already taken.  Deciding on a name because you like it, period, without finding out if it’s already established as belonging to someone else, labels you a beginner with no idea of how this internet/blogging stuff is actually done.

Please.  Don’t be that guy.

P.S.  The woman who is trying to establish herself as Mamacita – you with the cooking/homemaking/parenting/recipe blog – yeah, I’m talking to you – please change your persona.  I’m tired of getting your messages.

Quotation Saturday: Mothers

Mamacita says:  This is the weekend when we celebrate mothers.  This cannot be done with two or three sentences.

Mother and daughter, shoes

1.The phrase “working mother” is redundant. ~Jane Sellman

2. The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new. ~Rajneesh

3. I remember my mother’s prayers and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all my life. ~Abraham Lincoln

prying mother

4. A mother is a person who, seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie. ~Tenneva Jordan

last piece of pie

5. The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness. ~Honoré de Balzac

6. He is a poor son whose sonship does not make him desire to serve all men’s mothers. ~Harry Emerson Fosdick

7. An ounce of mother is worth a pound of clergy. ~Spanish Proverb

Charles W. Bartlett, Hawaiian Mother and Child

Charles W. Bartlett, Hawaiian Mother and Child

8. My mom is a neverending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being. I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune. ~Graycie Harmon

9. Any mother could perform the jobs of several air traffic controllers with ease. ~Lisa Alther

10. Grown don’t mean nothing to a mother. A child is a child. They get bigger, older, but grown? What’s that suppose to mean? In my heart it don’t mean a thing. ~Toni Morrison, Beloved

11. The only mothers it is safe to forget on Mother’s Day are the good ones. ~Mignon McLaughlin

Mother and Child, by Gustav Klimt

Mother and Child, by Gustav Klimt

12. A mom forgives us all our faults, not to mention one or two we don’t even have. ~Robert Brault

13. One good mother is worth a hundred schoolmasters. ~George Herbert

14. Mother is the name for God in the lips and hearts of little children. ~William Makepeace Thackeray

15. Every beetle is a gazelle in the eyes of its mother. ~Moorish Proverb

16. All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel Mother. ~Abraham Lincoln

Mother and baby giraffe

17. No one in the world can take the place of your mother. Right or wrong, from her viewpoint you are always right. She may scold you for little things, but never for the big ones. ~Harry Truman

18. God could not be everywhere, so He created mothers. ~Jewish Proverb

19. Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother. ~Oprah Winfrey

20. I regard no man as poor who has a godly mother. ~ Abraham Lincoln

21. The mother loves her child most divinely not when she surrounds him with comforts and anticipates his wants, but when she resolutely holds him to the highest standards and is content with nothing less than his best. ~ Hamilton Wright Mabie

22. The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world. ~ William Ross Wallace

Mother and baby

23. There never was a woman like her. She was gentle as a dove and brave as a lioness… The memory of my mother and her teachings were, after all, the only capital I had to start life with, and on that capital I have made my way. ~ Andrew Jackson

24. Who is getting more pleasure from this rocking, the baby or me? ~ Nancy Thayer

25. No matter how old a mother is, she watches her middle-aged children for signs of improvement. ~ Florida Scott-Maxwell

26. Sometimes when I look at all my children, I say to myself, ‘Lillian, you should have stayed a virgin.'” ~ Lillian Carter

27. And so our mothers and grandmothers have, more often than not anonymously, handed on the creative spark, the seed of the flower they themselves never hoped to see — or like a sealed letter they could not plainly read. ~ Alice Walker

28. Women do not have to sacrifice personhood if they are mothers. They do not have to sacrifice motherhood in order to be persons. Liberation was meant to expand women’s opportunities, not to limit them. The self-esteem that has been found in new pursuits can also be found in mothering. ~ Elaine Heffner

Vietnamese mother and child

29. If you bungle raising your children, I don’t think whatever else you do well matters very much. ~ Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis

30. I looked on child rearing not only as a work of love and duty but as a profession that was fully as interesting and challenging as any honorable profession in the world and one that demanded the best I could bring to it. ~ Rose Kennedy

31. A mother is not a person to lean on, but a person to make leaning unnecessary. ~ Dorothy Canfield Fisher

32. She was the archetypal selfless mother: living only for her children, sheltering them from the consequences of their actions — and in the end doing them irreparable harm. ~ Marcia Muller

33. Spend at least one Mother’s Day with your respective mothers before you decide on marriage. If a man gives his mother a gift certificate for a flu shot, dump him. ~ Erma Bombeck

Lioness and cub

34. No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed. I have known mothers who remake the bed after their children do it because there’s a wrinkle in the spread or the blanket is on crooked. This is sick. ~ Erma Bombeck

35. Becoming a mother makes you the mother of all children. From now on each wounded, abandoned, frightened child is yours. You live in the suffering mothers of every race and creed and weep with them. You long to comfort all who are desolate. ~ Charlotte Gray

36. Giving kids clothes and food is one of thing, but it’s much more important to teach them that other people besides themselves are important and that the best thing they can do with their lives is to use them in the service of other people. ~ Dolores Huerta

37. Blaming mother is just a negative way of clinging to her still. ~ Nancy Friday

38. I love people. I love my family, my children . . . but inside myself is a place where I live all alone and that’s where you renew your springs that never dry up. ~ Pearl S. Buck

39. The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. ~ Father Theodore Hesburgh

mother-and-child

40. When, however, one reads of a witch being ducked, of a woman possessed by devils, of a wise woman selling herbs, or even a very remarkable man who had a mother, then I think we are on the track of a lost novelist, a suppressed poet. . . indeed, I would venture to guess that Anon, who wrote so many poems without signing them, was often a woman. ~ Virginia Woolf

41. A mother’s love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path. ~ Agatha Christie

42. You do not really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother. ~ Albert Einstein

43. If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylum would be filled with mothers. ~ Edgar Watson Howe

44. What the mother sings to the cradle goes all the way down to the coffin. ~ Henry Ward Beecher

45. My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it. ~ Mark Twain

Botswana mother and child

46. Over the years I have learned that motherhood is much like an austere religious order, the joining of which obligates one to relinquish all claims to personal possessions. ~ Nancy Stahl

47. There never was a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him asleep ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

48. At work, you think of the children you have left at home. At home, you think of the work you’ve left unfinished. Such a struggle is unleashed within yourself. Your heart is rent. ~ Golda Meir

Mother and several children

49. A mother is she who can take the place of all others but whose place no one else can take. ~ Cardinal Mermilod

50. A mother’s yearning feels the presence of the cherished child even in the degraded man. ~ George Eliot

51. There are lots of things that you can brush under the carpet about yourself until you’re faced with somebody whose needs won’t be put off. ~ Angela Carter

migrant mother

52. Isidor Isaac Rabi’s mother used to ask him, upon his return from school each day, “Did you ask any good questions today, Isaac?” ~ Steve Chandler

53. Sometimes the poorest woman leaves her children the richest inheritance. ~ Ruth E. Renkel

54. Mother love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible. ~ Marion C. Garretty

55. A mother is never cocky or proud, because she knows the school principal may call at any minute to report that her child has just driven a motorcycle through the gymnasium. ~ Mary Kay Blakeley

56. It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~ Phyllis Diller

Renoir, Mother and Child

57. Parents often talk about the younger generation as if they didn’t have anything to do with it. ~ Haim Ginott

58. If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them, and half as much money. ~ Abigail Van Buren

silhouette59. Making a decision to have a child–it’s momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~ Elizabeth Stone

60. If you want your child to be brilliant, tell them fairy tales. If you want your child to be very brilliant, tell them even more fairy tales. ~ Albert Einstein

Meerkat mother and baby

Grammar Queen that I am – terrifyingly so, in fact, so watch your step – I absolutely love this cartoon:

william-haefeli, I have two mommies

Bonus quotations:

61.  Motherhood: All love begins and ends there. — Robert Browning

62  It’s a funny thing about mothers and fathers. Even when their own child is the most disgusting little blister you could ever imagine, they still think that he or she is wonderful. — Roald Dahl

63.. When you’re in the thick of raising your kids by yourself, you tend to keep a running list of everything you think you’re doing wrong. I recommend taking a lot of family pictures as evidence to the contrary. — Connie Schultz

64.  Kids don’t stay with you if you do it right. It’s the one job where, the better you are, the more surely you won’t be needed in the long run. — Barbara Kingsolver

65.  Being a mother is an attitude, not a biological relation. — Robert A. Heinlein

66.  My mother said to me, “If you are a soldier, you will become a general.  If you are a monk, you will become the Pope.”  Instead, i was a painter, and became Picasso. — Pablo Picasso

Mother and Child, Picasso, 1901

Mother and Child, Picasso, 1901

P.S. What’s that she’s saying? She needs to FIND HERSELF? “Find herself” my Aunt Fanny. Grow a pair, and be a parent to your child. He’ll have pals his own age. YOU can “find yourself” after your job is done.

P.P.S. Does anybody else love it when, out in public, a child says “Mama?” and forty women instinctively turn their heads?

 

Dirty Little Secrets

Dirty little secrets must not be revealed.

Mamacita says:   Headline news – More dirty little secrets:  yet another coach in this community has been dismissed. No details available to save the reputations of the two or three elitist families who complained that their special snowflakes weren’t given the preferential and gentle treatment they deserved.

I don’t know about you, but whenever I encounter anything like this, I am immediately suspicious of those who forbid the discussion. Those who whined are suspect, naturally, but it is those who allowed whiny people’s wishes to trump the truth and then forbid all discussion who are the real bad people here. The real bad people, and the really bad people. Grammar nerds like me will recognize the difference there. The point is, decent people don’t do things like this.  Decent people encourage open discussion, and the more the better.

What are they afraid of, anyway? The truth? I think that’s exactly what they’re afraid of: a truth that would prove them in the wrong.

"I want more playing time, Daddy! Make the mean coach stop telling me what to doooo, Daddy!"

“I want more playing time, Daddy! Make the mean coach stop telling me what to doooo, Daddy!”  Very well, darling, you shall get your way in this as you do in all other things.  Daddy and Mummy will make the mean man go away.

This community routinely discards its coaches, teachers, students. . . hard-working people in all walks, and inevitably the powers-that-be will forbid any discussion concerning the circumstances, whys, or wherefores, of the decision.  Not merely content to discourage, they will FORBID.

Everybody’s in the dark, and in the dark, there be monsters, and the biggest and most dangerous monsters there be, be rumor and innuendo.

The motto of this community's school board.

The motto of this community’s school board.

With some open discussion, rumor and innuendo would be banished. It’s almost as if the powers-that-be WANT rampant rumor and innuendo, to divert the people’s attention away from what is really happening. . . .

Oh, surely not.

Oh, surely ’tis so.

This town is famous for it. This town does it all the time. They do it to decent, winning coaches. They do it to creative, successful, and excellent teachers.

This town does it all the time. It’s their thang. We are run by a select group of people who demand and get their way in pretty much everything.  The pockets of our administrators and boards are full of people with money who also control the puppet strings that are fastened to the document-signing hands and also the hearts, souls, and mouths of most of our trusted elected officials.  I love my town, but much of it is a joke.  This breaks my hearts.  I love my town, and I trust almost nobody who is in charge of anything here.

I have lived here all my life.  I love it.  I want my town to be clean and successful and to encourage education and progress and creativity and above all, to be honest and absolutely above reproach in everything that is done here.

But. . . .

The same people are in charge of everything here.  Horrible things happen to those who speak out, or who refuse to pander to somebody’s pouty kid or wealthy parent.

But shhhhh, we can’t discuss it. It’s forbidden.

I’m Twelve Years Old – Old School, That Is

Mamacita says:  Old school?  Me?  Yes. Twelve years ago, a former student told me that I should start a blog.  “You’ve got such a lot to say about the world,” he said.  “Who cares what I think about the world?” I replied. “Lots of people would,” he said.

blogger

I couldn’t imagine that.  I’m nobody. I wondered if he was right. I guess he was, because I’ve been to conferences all over the country, and spoken to crowds of people, both individually and on panels.  People seem to recognize me even before they see my name tag.  People tell me that such-and-such a post really helped/spoke to them/influenced them, etc.  It’s really, really humbling.  And exciting.  And humbling. Who would have thought it?  Me, with a large readership and people who seemed to like me and take me seriously?  It’s like a dream.  The good kind, that comes true because you never dreamed it would be possible but it really did and you’re in shock and awe and Oz and Wonderland.  And Narnia and Hogwarts.  And the Tardis. And all the people who live in those places.

People trust me to represent their businesses online.  I love doing this, and I appreciate that trust more than words could ever express.

I’ve met so many wonderful people during this journey.  Some of them are still virtual friends, while I’ve met many face-to-face, but I’ve also learned during these twelve years that online friends can be as real as face-to-face friends.  Sure, there are creeps out there, but no more so than the number of creeps at the mall.

good and bad people online

I’ve learned not to be afraid of the world.  The world is actually pretty awesome, and it’s full of cool things and fantastic people.  Sure, there are fiery volcanic pits and treacherous waterfalls and cockroaches and people who lie, cheat, & steal, but there are also rainbows and sunsets and flowers and people who are good, true friends.  The forever kind.  I have also learned, to my intense sorrow, that issues can cause some people to renounce friendship.  I would never do that to a friend, but I know now that there are people who do.

That I would still be here twelve years after beginning this funky little blog is amazing to me, and yet, it’s also unthinkable to abandon it, as many are abandoning blogging for the shorter Twitter and Facebook.  Oh, I’m on those, too, but this blog saved my soul alive twelve years ago, and it’s done nothing but nourish me ever since. I am so grateful to the internet.  Really, I am.  It’s a world that was always there, but we had no way of accessing it easily.  Now, we can travel anywhere, see anything, contact anyone, and work for a business that’s a thousand miles away, in our pajamas, at midnight.

Thank you, dear readers, for making me feel special.  Twelve years is as an eternity in the internet Hourglassworld, but somehow I don’t feel old when I’m here.  I’m happy when I’m on Scheiss Weekly.  I’m happy reading your comments.  I love visiting YOUR blogs. I love visiting with you on the other social media sites, too, but I don’t think anything could ever completely replace a blog.  In twelve more years, I guess we’ll find out.

Also, I wonder if you really understand the title of this blog.  Scheiss Weekly.  Who speaks German? C’mon.  I tried to get Scheiss Daily, but somebody already owned it.

I was traumatized when I began this blog, and that is not an exaggeration.  Twelve years ago, I was traumatized, and the title reflected that.  I’m fine now, but the title keeps me humble.  And fairly sane, although my children might argue that fact.

Time marches on.  Time flies.  And yet, it really doesn’t.  Time stands still.  We march. With every blink of the eye, yes, and briefer even than that, our lives are moving ever swiftly towards their ends. It’s this middle that we must make the most of.  I am.  I hope you are, too.

Time flies

Here’s to twelve more years.  At a time, anyway. A day at a time, and they add up to years.

I love you all.  Literally.

Things I Still Haven’t Done Yet, Part 99

I'll get around to it. . . .

I’ll get around to it. . . .

Mamacita says:  There are still so many things I haven’t done yet; every time I make a list about this, I feel more and more like I am quite possibly the most boring person in the world.  Probably because I AM the most boring person in the world.

  1.  I still haven’t watched a single episode of Game of Thrones.  Sometimes I am tempted to peek but then I remember that I do not do blood, guts, betrayal, violence, decapitation, backstabbing, rape, murder,  suspense, torture, or horror, and I back away shuddering at the close call.
    This picture and quotation scare me to death. No.

    This picture and quotation scare me to death. No.

     

  2. I have never seen The Walking Dead nor do I ever, ever want to.  See #1 for reasons.
    No. Just, no.

    No. Just, no.

    3.  I haven’t watched Mad Men, although I probably will in a few years when the DVD’s get super cheap or it shows up on Amazon Prime.  I am in marketing so the appeal is there and it is magnetic.  I also own the soundtrack cd and it’s bloody awesome.

    Yes, definitely, eventually.

    Yes, definitely, eventually.

    4.  Orange is the New Black?  No.  Not into prison shows unless Morgan Freeman is paroled and says “I guess I just miss my friend.”

    "I guess I just miss my friend."

    “I guess I just miss my friend.” (This is not OITNB)

    5.  So far, everything here has been about shows I have never seen.  So on a different note, I have never seen a Graham Norton re-run that I didn’t absolutely love.  The man is brilliant and his program format is fantastic.

    I love this man.

    I love this man.

    See?  Not everything on this themed thread is negative!  And I do love several TV shows; sadly, few of them are still shown except on YouTube or DVD.  Which is fine by me because I hate commercials unless they are brilliantly and superbly written.

    The world could do with a little more television snobbery.  You know it.

    And now, back to our regularly schedule programming. . . .

    And now, back to our regularly scheduled programming. . . .

“You Kids Sit Still and Behave!”

Mamacita says:  “You kids sit still and behave!  Oh, the nostalgia!

When I was a kid, my family used to drive down to Alabama almost every summer. We had relatives down there, fabulous relative we all adored, and often the entire extended family would travel down there in caravans, and there would be canvas army cots all over the place at night. I have a feeling that my southern aunt and uncle might not have loved those weeks as much as we did. . . .

My Alabama cousins were several years older, and I thought they were adults, I really did. Cool, stylish, trendy adults. I think the cousin closest in years to me might have been twelve.  Those cousins had the most wonderful dolls, and they had musical powder boxes, and pogo sticks, and a house with intercoms.  Their southern towns always had Putt Putt courses, which we called “miniature golf,” with more glowing neon than Vegas.  And a dog.  I loved visiting down there.

Revlon doll

Revlon doll

It is not the destination that I wish to speak of, however. It is the journey.

The trip itself. That’s what this post is about. The destination is nothing compared to the journey. The journey, and the traveling peripherals.

This was before the time of the interstate highway, and the drive took us through every little town, middle-sized town, and city in southern Indiana, Kentucky, Tennessee, and half of Alabama. We stopped at the occasional little local restaurant, because this was also before the day of the big chain restaurants. This meant, of course, that most of the time the food was actually good. Our car did not have air conditioning, which meant that we rode with all the windows down. It also meant that Dad had a very sunburned left arm.

There was no such thing as carseats for babies or toddlers, unless you counted those little canvas seats that hooked over the back of the front seat, and when we were on vacation, the car was too full for one of those. There were no seatbelts, either. Two parents, four kids, and a grandmother in one ’59 Chevy made a pretty full load.

Check out the fishtail on this 1959 Chevy!

Check out the fishtail on this 1959 Chevy!

There was no stereo in the car, either. Not even a radio. No DVD player. No basket of various snacks. No cases of water. No drop-down table for board games. No earphones for individual Mp3 playlists. The windows weren’t tinted, which meant it was easy to see the sights.

Dad was in charge, and we stopped when HE wanted to stop. And if we needed him to stop, it was of vital importance that we never tell him we needed to stop. It made him mad, and he would drive even farther just to demonstrate that he was in charge. This never bothered me, because I could, even as a small child, “hold it” for hours on end, but it pretty much killed my Other Sister, who generally needed to pee every twenty minutes. Fifteen minutes from our house and she was not only asking if we were there yet, she was already asking to go to the bathroom.  Dad wasn’t unreasonable about stopping, of course; he just expected common sense, and he got it.  Oh, boy, did he ever get it.

We could never afford to take our children on a real vacation until the summer between their 3rd and 5th grade. That year, for our first family vacation ever, we borrowed my parents’ van, mortgaged our financial future for NINE YEARS with a new Discover Card, and went to Disney World.

That’s right; it took nine years to pay off Discover. NEVER USE THIS CARD. It has the highest interest in the universe. But I digress.

My point is, all my father and mother had to do to maintain almost perfect order in a vehicle was to turn around and say “You kids sit still and behave.” And we did. We weren’t buckled in, so sitting still took some real effort, but disobeying our parents was far worse than sitting still. We looked out the windows, and counted cows, and sang, and played word games, and napped. We ate only when Dad stopped at a restaurant, although we did travel with a bushel of fresh peaches; we loved to watch dad toss the pits out of his window.

Dad always bought his peaches and apples at Appleacres. So do we, now.

Dad always bought his peaches and apples at Appleacres. So do we.

On that trip to Disney World with my own kids, all we had to do was say “Sit still and behave.” and they behaved. We didn’t travel with toys, or vcr’s. We looked out the windows and counted cows and sang and played games. Sometimes, the kids napped. Really, the only differences between our trip and my parents’ trip were the seat belts, the cooler of fruit (instead of a bushel), and the fact that we usually stopped when the children said they needed to stop.

Here is what I do not understand at all, not one single little tiny bit: why do modern parents supply their vehicles – and thus their children – with all the comforts of home? Why do families need movies, and toys, and a constant supply of snacks, for a road trip? Why do parents nowadays allow their children to dictate when they stop and where? Why don’t parents tell their kids to look out the windows, count the cows, play word games, and sing?

My parents talked to us when we were on the road. A lot of modern parents couldn’t talk to their kids if they wanted to, because the kids are watching Disney in the back of the minivan, or are locked into their headphones and iPads.

Modern kids couldn’t tell you about the scenery because they never look at it. They demand the same comforts of a vehicle that they demand at home: television, toys, food, drinks, electronics, and their own way.

A lot of modern parents would gasp in horror if they heard another parent say “You kids sit still and behave yourselves.”

When did it happen that road trips became such a big deal? Tons of toys. Baskets and boxes of juiceboxes and graham crackers and cheese and bottled water. Always with the water. I don’t think most people these days have ever been really thirsty because they’re never without a bottle of water.  No wonder they have to stop all the time.

We never had drinks in the car. We drank when we stopped. We knew what it felt like to be genuinely thirsty and we appreciated those rare drinks very much. There were no sticky spills and no crumbs or wrappers in my parents’ car.  We weren’t severely dehydrated.  We were just thirsty.

When we stopped to eat, we parked and went inside. No food or drinks came back outside with us. We ate and drank in the restaurant. And we appreciated it, for we were hungry. After we ate, we weren’t hungry and didn’t need any snacks or drinks “for the road.”

What’s the matter with people these days? Let your kids get thirsty. Let them get hungry. Don’t anticipate EVERYTHING because when you do, they don’t appreciate what they get when they get it.

If they cry or scream for food or toys, etc, tell them to look out the window, and count the cows, and see who can be first to find a blue house or an unusual animal crossing sign or a goat or a three-story house or a picket fence or a restaurant that isn’t a chain. You might also practice turning around and saying, “You kids sit still and behave.”

Unusual animal crossing, unless you're in Australia

Unusual animal crossing, unless you’re in Australia

And if they don’t obey you, you’ve got a far bigger problem than you might think.