Isn’t there some kind of law that says that a creditor can’t call your house during certain hours? Wouldn’t that mean, say, don’t call before 8 a.m.? Or after 10 p.m.?

Because those people from J.C. Penney’s and Visa are not only up at the crack of dawn, they’re also burning the midnight oil. Please don’t call me in the morning, Penney’s. And while I am never in bed at ten thirty, many people are. Don’t call then, either.

In fact, don’t call at all. Do you have my records there with you? Do you not see that I always pay, that I have never not paid?

And do they really think I would give my bank codes to a total stranger who can’t even speak English very well, and who mispronounces my name? Right. Ordinarily, I wouldn’t even answer the phone with that “Caller Unknown” on the I.D. screen, but I have a lot of out-of-state friends with cell phones, and they always come up “Caller Unknown,” too.

I hate it when it’s you and not them, though. Bah.

You’ll all get your money, I promise.

Hey, at least I didn’t say, “The check is in the mail.” Because, it isn’t. Not yet. Sigh.