Ah, our local newspaper. They can’t write, they can’t spell, they have no concept of “homonyms,” and they’d rather report the news of any town or county except our own, but I’ll have to hand it to them for headline phrasing.

Really, it’s surprising to find something like this on the sports page. That’s usually the biggest and most accurate of any of the sections in this newspaper.

I think that’s because the children of many prominent and wealthy citizens are so often mentioned on it.

Funny, that’s the exact same reason I was given, many years ago, when I asked why the kids in the town schools were getting so many more freebies with their book rental than were the kids in the county schools, when everyone paid the same amount of book rental fees. It didn’t make any sense in that context, either. And after I mentioned it at a meeting, the fees for everyone in the system went up, and the curriculum director asked me how I felt being responsible for that. He said that nobody would ever have known if I hadn’t told them.

I was so young then, and so naive. I felt terrible about it, and apologized to him for spilling the beans. Now I’d just point at him and say ‘Busted,’ and blog about it for the whole world to see.

Kind of like I just did.

“Hooters on display. . . .” I think that might knock “Porky and Bess on IU Stage” off the Number One spot on my list of goofy local headlines.