I’m assuming she’s in Ann Arbor. She started driving that direction. She called several times from the road. She’s had plenty of time to get there by now. PLENTY of time.

I’m sure she’ll call and tell me she’s safe at her friend’s house and not in a ditch by the side of the road somewhere. Any minute now she’ll call.

The phone has rung many times today but it wasn’t her.

Total strangers found time to call. They got me instead of their church but still, they called.

(I wish that church would change its phone number. Or else, I wish their people would dial more carefully.) (After about five wrong numbers in a row from that church’s eldersection, I tend to get rude.) (I try not to be rude, but why can’t those people use a phone correctly?) (And what time does that church office open? Those old people start calling me at DAWN!) (And they’re always angry and confused that I’m not the church secretary.) (One old woman asked me to recommend a visiting nurse for her “anyway.” ) (They’ve asked me to dial the church and ask the secretary to call them back since “my phone doesn’t seem to be working right.” ) (This happens EVERY DAY.) (By “dawn” I mean any time before noon.) (We had this number before they had theirs, one digit removed.) (It could be worse; Mom’s number is one digit removed from the local ob/gyn.)

“Dial.” Did you all catch that? Am I a fogie or what.

Yes, any minute now she’ll call and tell me she arrived safely. In my car. And that the keys are in her hand. Not locked inside the car.

Any. Minute. Now.

Hold on! Be right back!

. . . . . . . .

Nope.

I’m going to be driving an old rusty van to work tomorrow night. Not that she should feel bad about that or anything. Or call to let me know she’s safe. No big deal. Yes, I’ll be driving all that way in an old unreliable van. That’s because I let her borrow our only good vehicle. But that’s okay because her safety is important. We love her, and I really don’t mind driving the van to work tomorrow night. Late. In the dark.

Is there anyone I can call from the ditch at the side of the road, just in case? My daughter doesn’t seem to have her phone turned on. Up there in ANN ARBOR, in MY CAR, and all.

We never stop worrying, folks. That’s because there’s never a shortage of things to worry about.

We can’t plan ahead for them, either. They always come from out of the blue.

This old van has no cd player. What am I going to do?

I guess it’s time to bring my Queen’s Greatest Hits cassette tape out from its hiding place.

“Open up your mind and let me step inside;
Rest your weary head and let your heart decide.
It’s so easy when you know the rules. . . .”

Rule number one: Call your mother when you arrive at your destination.

Hmmph.