Oh jeepers gee WHILIKERS, one of my posts has been syndicated on my wondrous BlogHer!

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Mamacita says:  Okay, so, today’s what, the 15th?  It’s time for another politically incorrect rant!  Be warned, oh overly-sensitive types born without the ability to discern. . . .

I am a Christmas fanatic. I live for this season. I LOVE this time of year, the anticipatory days, the buildup, the baking, the decorating, the smiling faces, the wreaths, the trees, the twinkling lights that make the whole neighborhood look like the starry sky, the making of lists, the checking of them twice, the looking FORWARD, the happiness, the glow, the very atmosphere of the world.

Well, of the fun world, anyway, the nice world, the world of generous people who care; the grinches and grumps of the world don’t count. I believe in the TRUE meaning of Christmas, but if you don’t, that’s your business. I do think even non-believers could get into the SEASON, if not the REASON, and have a lot of fun with it, and most of them do and are glad of it. But every party needs a pooper, that’s why we invited you. . . . . so sit in the corner and complain and try to ruin it for the majority of the nation, go ahead, whine away, oh boo hoo your rights are being trampled because other people (who constitute a majority, by the way) are all happy and singing. . . oh, grow up and look around, you loser!!! Most of us are happier than usual, and thinking of others and trying to make our personal spaces a little prettier, and thinking generous thoughts for a change, and trying to help others in the coldest time of the year, and you’re picketing stores and throwing people’s innocent good will back in their faces and writing editorials demanding your scroogeish rights and doing your best to put a damper on it all.

Shame on you.

And, shame again. Lighten up. Embrace the emotional impact, if you don’t have it in you to embrace any other aspect of it. It’s a religious thing, yes, but nobody has a loaded gun to your right cheek demanding that you surrender all your own beliefs.  But it’s also a cultural thing, and a seasonal thing, and an emotional thing, and a love thing, and a caring thing, and a sharing thing, and it makes people happy when they participate, and if you choose not to participate in any part of it, at least shut up about it so you don’t drag others down with you. You have your rights? Yes, you do. And so do the rest of us, and that’s something you don’t seem to wish to acknowledge in any way because you’re too busy trying to get an entire culture to shut down and do things your way. It’s not going to happen, Scrooge. If you don’t like it, move away.

Yes. Move away. You know, to some OTHER country where you’re allowed to worship, behave, believe, eat, drink, etc, exactly as you please. . . . . oops. Um, wait a second. IS there another country where you’re allowed to do those things? Besides this one that you spend all your time putting down?

I don’t THINK so.

Therefore, if you intend to stay here, please understand something: you have your rights, and so does everyone else. You choose to be joyless at this time of year, others choose to be joyful. Neither of us is going to change. You choose to hug your personal beliefs close and honestly, I’ve never heard you say anything positive at this time of year so I’m not altogether sure what your beliefs ARE, if indeed you have any goals except to stifle everyone else, but whatever they are, you’ve a right to them.  Please collect your wits about you for a moment and discern that everyone else has rights, too.  There are more of us than of you. Stay in your dark cheerless house if you don’t want to see happy sharing singing people.

Sit there in your dark hole and practice saying things like “Bah, humbug,” and “My RIGHTS are being obstructed!!!! Oh WAHHHHH”  “How DARE that old lady smile at me and give my child a candy cane!” “My neighbors all have wreaths and I am SOOOO OFFENDED!”  “A clerk wished me a Merry Christmas?  I’ll SUE!”  Stuff like that. Be sure your windows are open so the neighbors can hear you. Put a sign on your door, too, to warn people away lest a neighbor bring you a cake or a box of cookies – more signs that your rights are being disrespected.

What’s the matter, you can’t enjoy someone else’s holiday? Okay, then you should be the one who volunteers to work the Christmas shifts for people. It doesn’t mean anything to you, right? You’ll get more money, and that’s important to you, right? Then why aren’t you first in line for that? It would be a wonderful gift for a father or mother who would love to be home with their kids for Christmas. . . .but then, you don’t give gifts, do you, so that’s out. And asking you to work when others don’t would be yet another manisfestation of your rights being trampled.

Honestly. I hope you are in therapy.

But I digress. It’s the 15th of December, and I haven’t done any shopping*  yet. My kids are going to have some kind of Christmas this year, and I don’t care if Tim and I don’t eat for a month afterwards. We don’t need to be eating, anyway, gad.

So, to the majority of the world, a very Merry Christmas. To the rest of you, carry on, and be careful lest you accidently eat a cookie or hear a song or see some twinkling lights; it might scar you for life.  Watch out for smiling happy people, too, lest you be subjected to good wishes.

It’s going to be a very lean Christmas, but no power, principality, or grumpy old fart in the universe can keep it from being merry!

*And, by “going shopping,” what I’m really saying is, “I’m checking out the bargains online.”  It’s cold outside.

P.S.  By the way, I LOVE IT when people with different beliefs share.  Sadly, they seldom seem to.  Around these parts, such people mostly seem to get off on whining.